Monday, May 15, 2006

My Mom is______

Luke must not be too bright. I thought he was moving along nicely as far as his intelligence goes, but he seems to have hit a small bump in the road. I thought he was doing fine in school. His teachers think he is ready to move on, and that he will be a fine student. I have my doubts. I did not have my doubts until he brought home his Mother’s Day card. After reading this 4-year-olds card, I know he has to be held back.

The card was one of those fill in the blank cards. The teachers had 4 statements typed out, and the kids had to fill in the blanks.

My favorite thing to do with my mom is ___________.

Luke’s answer was, go to the zoo. This is a fine answer, as my wife does take them to the zoo a lot. So that was a cute, good answer.

My mom has ________ hair.

Luke says blonde. Now, this is true to a certain degree. I will not take points off for this answer, as she has it highlighted blonde. But I can’t expect a 4-year-old to understand such nonsense.

My mom is ______ years old.

Luke’s answer was 30. Now, my wife looks like she is in her late 20’s, but she is not. Luke may be looking for some extra attention, so he went low in order to score points, or he has no concept of age. Then with the last statement, I realized that Luke needs more schooling.

My mom is the best _________ in the whole world.

Luke says Cleaner. Luke thinks his mother is the best cleaner in the entire world. I don’t know what he sees, and I don’t know what he is thinking, but I have an issue with this answer. I am not saying that my wife is a bad cleaner, I am just saying that she is not the Best cleaner. See, I believe that in order to be the best at something, you actually have to do it. Again, this is not a shot at my wife. We do not live in a dirty house, but we do not clean it to the merits of best in the world. I believe that my wife has cleaning on her agenda, but it is listed somewhere near cooking, and laundry. Those two things are way down the priority list. Luke seems to think that she is the best in the world at this. This worries me. Luke has poor observation skills. My wife definitely ranks as one of the best mothers in the world, but cleaners? No Luke, you got that wrong. That is 2 out of 4 on the test. That is 50%. 50% is an F. I think we have to hold him back.


Anonymous teri said...

hopefully the wife doesn't read your blog, ouch!

12:00 PM  
Blogger WILLIAM said...

Is there a chance he copied from the kid next to him?

1:04 PM  
Blogger T. said...

You do realize them's is fighting words, right?

Either you are a very brave man, or the apple didn't fall far from this tree. Hmm...

1:07 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I hope the couch is clean cause I think that is where you'll be sleeping tonight.

1:39 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Any chance Mrs Smith from the respiratory office is the best ____________ in the world?

2:59 PM  
Anonymous the dogwalker said...

Dear. Mr. Whipserer,
I hope you are truly a sexual camel!

3:33 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I am interested in how you would have answered those same 4 questions substituting wife in for mom.

8:48 AM  
Blogger Sharfa said...

I think the kid should skip ahead. He already knows how to score tons of brownie points.

He may just be smarter than Dad.

9:50 AM  
Anonymous Michael said...

That was funny!!!

5:53 PM  

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