My 7 Opinions

The saying goes like this: Opinions are like Assholes, everybody has one. I find this statement to be true. Now, I take this to another level. If opinions and assholes are one in the same, then I have seven opinions for brothers. Here’s the deal. My brothers are all assholes. I don’t mean this in a derogatory way. It is almost said as a term of endearment. I can’t tell you the amount of times that the last words out of my mouth before I hang up the phone with any of them is, “you’re an asshole, later.”

Now if you were to interview any one of those 7 guys, they would all tell you the same thing. “Yeah, my brothers are assholes.” If you were to interview my dad, he would say the same thing. My mother’s response would be a little bit different. She would more than likely add my father to the list. So she would say something to the affect, “ I raised eight assholes, and married one.” Now, if you interviewed my sister, the one and only female in the litter, you would have to cover the young peoples ears. She thinks we’re more than assholes. I can’t print the things she would say. So, I have no problem saying that we are a family of assholes, or opinions if you like.

It’s fun. Whenever all of the Opinions get together, we laugh. We have a great time with our assholeness. Do you think Disney would pick us up and do a show? The Lawnwhisperer and the 7 Opinions. It’s got a nice ring to it. We could have names just like Sleepy and Doc, but ours would be Big, and Stupid.

Big Asshole said to Stupid Asshole, “hey lets go make fun of F-ing Asshole and see if he gets pissed.” Sounds like quality TV to me, but then again, that's just my opinion.