Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Green Beans, yuk.

Dinnertime at my house is a bit of a chore. It is not a chore that I have to cook most nights; cause I have come to grips with that aspect of my wife, I mean my life. It is a chore to get the boys to both eat at the same time, and in a timely manner. Kyle is a slow eater. When I say slow, I would want everyone to picture a worm sliding across the driveway after a heavy rainstorm. Luke is a very fast eater. By fast, I would want everyone to picture how quick my wife could fake sleeping when I am trying to get some action. Kyle doesn’t like anything, and Luke likes everything. So it is a pain in the ass.

The other night Vicki had to run out to the store. The boys and I were eating, and she decided to go then. Right before she walked out the door, she hesitated and said, “Maybe I should wait until they are done eating, cause you won’t make them finish their dinner.”
“What are you talking about?” I said. “I will make them finish.” She shook her head and said, “No you won’t, they will wear you down, and you will throw it away, and then tell me that they finished. I will come home and you guys will be eating cookies and watching TV, and the dinner will be in the trash can.”

I denied such shenanigans, and waited for her to leave. After she left, I had to do a sweep for hidden cameras. How the hell did she know that I do that? I can’t sit there and force my kids to eat green beans. You’re damn right that they go down the garbage disposal, when she is not looking, but how does she know that? The kids and I have a code of silence on such topics, or so I thought. Cause when Vicki walked in from the store, and we were sitting on the couch, eating popsicles, and watching TV, the first thing she said was, “Luke did you eat all of your dinner?” He looked at her, then he looked at me, and he said, “No, dad took it.”

That damn Luke. From here on out, he has to finish his green beans. Kyle and I will watch TV and eat cookies by ourselves.

9 Comments:

Blogger Stacie said...

Ratted out by the kid! Classic! Watch out for this one..."Mom, Dad said it was ok if I have a {insert toy, food or puppy here} he said to get the $$ from you"

If he's alreay ratting you out, it's only a matter of time before he pulls that one!

stacie

1:15 PM  
Anonymous aimee@thestolenolive.net said...

I seriously believe the "finish your dinner" philosophy has a lot to do with the obsese society we have now.

It started with those who were kids in the great depression... who grew up to be adults and told their kids... eat everything on your plate... we didn't have much when we were kids.

And... forcing kids to eat what they don't like... only insures the fact that they will be 30 years old and ordering their hamburgers with meat and cheese only. As long as dinner time is a power struggle they will never learn to try new things.

Throw those green beans away every time DAD!

1:55 PM  
Blogger sari said...

I'm glad my kid isn't the only one surviving on buttered noodles and/or rice.

2:58 PM  
Anonymous momo9 said...

L.W., kids get tall when they eat their greens. They become superb athletes. Great soccer, basketball, baseball, and football players. Greens is the secret. Peas, green beans, asparagus, broccolli,lettuce etc. etc. Greens make 6 footers plus. The reason that you're only 5ft 3in is the fact that you did not eat greens.:) Think about it! Tell those little people greens are important! Bet you change your mind now!!

4:59 PM  
Blogger WILLIAM said...

Momo9 totally burned you. 5 foot 3. Hah that is funny.

9:00 PM  
Anonymous SoozieQ said...

You're only 5 foot 3 inches tall?!?!? Oh wow, hey...that's cool.

2:54 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You know what they say about guys who are 5' 3" ??????

They need stepstools to reach the garbage disposal.

7:30 AM  
Blogger Jewl said...

Women have a third eye... they don't need to have cameras hidden around the house.. DUH! LOL

11:28 AM  
Blogger Sharpie said...

They ALWAYS tell the truth. Always. Bastards.

12:47 PM  

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